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What Churches Can Learn From McDonalds 

i know many humans who are looking to move to new churches and serve as senior pastors, and even church planters (pastor john is one).  as i talk with these called and gifted humans i am amazed at the processes they need to travel - some are amazing.  one pastor told me that in one year he emailed over 200 churches, and did not receive an email back from any of them - none, zero, nada - amazing, a church that claims unity and acceptance can not even email a person wanting to be their pastor - imagine how they treat humans who desire to join the church - scary.

while i could go on about churches, i would like to share with you one punk monkey's point of view when it comes to church planting - a process you humans seem to have very wrong.  picture this, you are one of the assistant managers of a mcdolalds.  you have been approached by the district to start (plant) a new mcdonalds - here's the plan:

1. you need to move, at your expense, to a pre-selected city.

2. you need to find work to support yourself while you develop the franchise.  if you desire not to find work, you will need to develop a contact list of people who will send you money.

3. you, at home, invite one person at a time to your house to buy the burgers you are making.

4. you encourage them to invite their friends to increase sales.

5. when you have large enough sales, you need to purchase a location - which must be approved by the corporation and the ownership of that location is the corporations.

does that seem real to you?  not to me!  why is it that humans demand church planters to put 100% of all they are - faith, family, love, grace, and commitment, into the building of a church - and very little is given in return?  here are some of the reasons that have been given over the past:

we don't have enough money:  "church planting is important, but we just don't have the cash to get them started."  was the reaction of one "director of church planting."  now, i will admit i am not as "high" a primate as humans - but if you don't have the money, why have a director?  one director said, "finding a person who will plant a church for us for free shows that that person has a true christian heart, and is committed to our denomination."  or, to look at it from another point of view, a denomination that financially supports it's planters are christian and dedicated to the care of its people.

we have a plan:  this is the one that kills me, in a "non-killing kind of way."  one denomination has the plan to plant 2010 churches by the year 2010 - it's quite, and it's catchy, but it is not realistic - if money is a problem, and we take into account that 7 out of 10 church plants fail (mostly due to financial reasons) then the church would need to plant over 7000 churches - which they can not afford to do.

we offer coaching:  that's cool, but it is totally irrelevant.  most of the churches being planted today are striving to deal with a postmodern generation, and most of the coaches pastor modern churches - they do not mix.  modern concepts and modern principles are of no value to a postmodern people.  

most, if not all, denominations believe they have a call to plant, they claim a drive to plant and a passion for the lost - yet they are unwilling to put anything into it - success is totally in the realm of the planter.  what minimal support is given to most planters is heart braking.  so, what does this little punk monkey suggest you humans do?  simple - SUPPORT CHURCH PLANTING.

denominations need to honestly and completely support church planting - high impact planting.  planting where the church has a good fighting chance of taking root and growing.  put money into the plants - not just a few dollars, major dollars - and in turn those churches must have a desire to support the efforts of church planting.  i know of a church with an average attendance of 8,000 that has planted four high impact churches over the past four years - each time, they ask 500 members to be part of the plant, to support it and to get involved with it, and they put $250,000 into each plant - out of the four churches, all are successful and over 2000 at this point - and looking to do the same - now you have a church planting movement.

PuNk mOnKEy -